Meanwhile the boat, already a few miles offshore was being tossed about by the waves, for the wind against it. During the fourth watch of the night, he came toward them. When the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified. “It is a ghost,” they said and they cried out in fear. At once Jesus spoke to them, “Take courage, it is I; Do not be afraid.” Peter said to him in reply, “Lord if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” (Matthew 14: 24-29)
I am at the same place Peter was as he watched Jesus walk across the stormy waters. I desperately want to jump into the water and follow Him, follow the quiet whisperings He has shared with me.
I feel the Holy Spirit flowing through me, guiding me, encouraging me, supporting me. Yet I hold back, I fear, I don’t trust. I recently read in my Word Among Us devotional the three steps of discipleship:
1) Jesus invites us to take a step in faith.
2) We realize we may be in over our heads and begin to doubt. Maybe I even turn back and run for cover.
3) We call out to the Lord and He helps.
I think right now I am somewhere around phase two. I have heard His call and I have taken those first tentative steps. But now that I am on the water I am starting to feel overwhelmed. I want to go back to the boat. Excuses assault me from all sides. Satan bombards me with reasons not to continue on this path. “You can’t do it. You are a fiction writer, what can you share?” These are just a few of the lies he is sending my way. Jesus can barely be heard above the cacophony of Satan’s untruths. I am frozen in place by his lies.
A small voice finds its way through the storm. It offers a hand, an embrace. It picks me up.
I used to do counted cross-stitch and I cross-stitched a popular poem Footprints in the Sand. A person is walking on the beach with God and talking about the footprints from his life. The person wondered why at some points in his life why there was only one set of footprints and why God hadn’t been there at those times? God’s answer was simple. “That’s when I carried you.”
Am I too human, too proud, and too fearful to let God carry me? Will I turn away from the storms of life remain rooted in my fear and not experience what Jesus has for me on the other side?
It is time to take the next step, to reach my hand out in faith and accept what only Jesus is offering. It is time to disprove and silence Satan’s lies.
My prayer for today and every day: Lord help me step out in faith today.
Copyright 2014, Christina Weigand