I’m Not Enough

If you have faith the size of a mustard seed you will say to this mountain ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. (Matthew 17:20)

Here’s another one:

Therefore my beloved brothers, be firm, steadfast, always fully devoted to the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. (1 Corinthians 15:58)

And the words from a song I can’t seem to remember the title to right now:

It’s not impossible.

I struggle with the misconceptions, I’m not praying enough, not spending enough time with God, not doing enough volunteer work. Basically it comes down to in my mind: I’m not enough!

As long as I continue with these thoughts, let them flood and overwhelm me, I am letting Satan have the upper hand.

There have been a lot of changes in my life in recent months, with more on the horizon. It would be so easy to give in to these “can’t” and “supposed to” thoughts and let Satan win this time. The problem is that he’ll make it even easier the next time and the time after that until I reach a point where I no longer even try God’s way.

A funny thing about God’s way: it really doesn’t take any more than you have in that moment. Look at Peter, a fisherman. We’ve all heard the story about how he didn’t have enough faith to walk on water. Let’s take a look at what happened in those seconds before he lost faith. He was walking on water beside Jesus. Peter took a leap of faith and stepped out of that boat, that place of safety and walked on water, just like Jesus.

Another time, Peter swears that he believes Jesus is the savior, the Son of God. Then in the next breath, he’s trying to convince Jesus that he shouldn’t go to Jerusalem to be crucified, his faith put aside, to be replaced with fear and doubt.

I often fall into the same trap as Peter. My faith wavers and I try to do it on my own, without Jesus at my side. Or I give up thinking I’m not enough. Just like the apostles, like Peter, I refuse to acknowledge that my faith is enough, for the time and place I am. God will take my mustard seed of faith and grow it into a mighty mustard tree.

Satan’s seeds only tear down and destroy my faith. But if we bar the gates and keep him out of the garden, don’t let him scatter the seeds of fear, doubt and distrust, we to can be like Peter; fertile ground for God’s will to be done.

One other thing: we will stumble, like Peter, Paul, Moses and many others before us. But when we get back up with God’s help, God welcomes us back. He never gives up on us.

Copyright © 2012, Christina Weigand

Christina Weigand

Christina Weigand

Christina Weigand’s a writer, wife, and mother of four. She is also Nana to three granddaughters. She lives with her husband and youngest daughter in Cranberry Twp. Pennsylvania, returning there after a short sabbatical in Washington. Currently, she’s working on fantasy novels and inspirational writing. Through her writing, she strives to share the Word of God and help people young and old to realize the love and mercy He has for everyone. When she’s not writing, she’s active in her local Church as a lector, Bible Study, volunteering at her daughter’s school helping the children develop a love for reading and writing. Jesus fills her home with love as she shares Him through her writing.

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