When I stop to think about the work I do, whether in the various venues I write or in my own home, it’s hard to stop from being paralyzed.
Who am I to give anyone advice about Christianity?
Who am I to be entrusted with the souls of these children and the responsibility of parenthood?
I’m not the first one to feel this way, I know. But when I’m in this mindset I feel so alone. It’s not hard to convince myself that I will fail (reference those past failures), that I will screw things up royally (reference past ventures), that I’m in no way worthy of these great tasks (reference checkered past).
I need to look no farther than Mary.
She was quite an unlikely disciple herself, wasn’t she? A poor girl from the middle of nowhere, destined to play a part in salvation history. From where she sat as she said Yes to Gabriel, she couldn’t have envisioned how it played out in the end.
And how about Peter? He of the enthusiastic support and adamant denial, he who walked on water and crashed through the waves, he who lived passionately and died violently.
Come to think of it, all of the disciples were pretty unlikely. None of them were rich, well-known, or even educated. How were they supposed to succeed?
It’s by the grace of God that I can make it through some days, and it’s definitely by His hand that I have any sort of impact beyond the small circle that is myself.
What does He need from me?
Just a Yes. And for that, I can focus on Mary, who’s sure to lead me to that Yes…and to Jesus, every single time.
Copyright © 2012, Sarah Reinhard