I had an interesting experience the other day with a young man in the eighth grade. His mom had been trying on and off all school year to get him to come to class for Confirmation with no success. I had never met him but she asked if she could bring him by so we could all talk about what do in regard to receiving the sacrament. To add a twist, the young man, “Joe,” was baptized in a mainline Protestant denomination and so also needed to make a Profession of Faith and receive Communion.
We begin our conversation and he expresses some concerns over things he has learned in the past about what the Church teaches. One thing was really bothering him. “Why does God send all the aborted babies and babies who are born but die without being baptized to hell? That seems very wrong and mean. How can God do that? It makes no sense.”
I agreed, it made no sense and was not even a correct teaching. I asked him to agree with me, just for a moment, that God made us and loves us. He said he agreed. I added that God would never to do anything like that to his children whom he loved. He seemed quite relieved that God wasn’t condemning these babies to hell.
We talked a bit more and then I asked him if he wanted to be confirmed. He said yes, so I further explained that he would make a profession of faith as well, saying that he wants to be Catholic.
There was a big pause in the conversation and a deep breath on Joe’s part. I wait, saying nothing.
“Not sure I want to do that,” he said.
“Okay, why?”
“I think I want to be Buddhist.”
As gently as I could I explained that since he was already baptized, he was a Christian and that could not be undone. I asked him why he wanted to be Buddhist. His reasons were varied but mainly had to do with the fact that he liked the idea of reincarnation, self-fulfillment, and living in a way that involved choices.
I responded to all his statements simply and clearly, doing my best to keep smiling. Toward the end of the conversation he looked at me and expressed his surprise that I was not trying to convince him he was wrong, coerce him into confirmation, or yell at him. I said that I didn’t think those were good tactics and that I was here to listen and guide him, not judge.
We agreed to keep talking and that he would come to a confirmation class to see what it’s like. I will pray that he comes and finds his way to the Church.
I was very much convicted after that conversation that what we need to do with our young people is listen to them and then lead them to Jesus. Sadly, I think we are doing it wrong. And I am not sure what is right.
Copyright © 2013, Deanna Bartalini
Deanna Bartalini
Deanna G. Bartalini, is a Catholic writer, speaker, and educator. She serves on the retreat team at Our Lady of Florida Spiritual Center. Deanna loves teaching about Catholicism and how it fits into our daily lives. She writes at DeannaBartalini.com, serves as the editor of the NewEvangelizers.com blog, and is a contributor there as well as at AmazingCatechists.com. Deanna contributed to A Catholic Mom's Prayer Companion published by Ave Maris Press. She is the author of “Invite the Holy Spirit into Your Life: Growing in Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control” published by Our Sunday Visitor. Deanna is available to lead retreats and speak at catechist and ministry events.
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